I Promise that next post will be something happy

So here's how my weekend had gone. Friday, I get a wonderful letter from my neurosurgeon letting me know that as of March 31 he is leaving his practice here in Wichita and moving to Lima, OH. There are no other neurosurgeons in the Wichita Clinic so I'm on my own essentially to try and find someone else to do any and all follow up work.

Today, my sweet grandmother calls. She was so short of breath that we only talked for a couple of minutes. Her live-in nurse, Mary, gets on the phone to talk to me. It's never good when Mary needs to talk to me. When my grandfather died 20 years ago, he left my grandmother very well off. He left her enough money to last her lifetime and still have more than enough to pass on to his two children and their children. Apparently, that's all come crashing down. My mother has been on all of Gran's accounts for several years now and in the last two years or so, she has managed to drain 2 of the 4 accounts and was apparently working on the 3rd when Gran's accountant caught the rapid depletion. So what should have been able to last all of Gran's life and most likely mine will now only cover about 2 1/2 years for Gran. I am devastated that my mother could do something like this. I knew that she was spending more than she should and that she was making frequent trips to casinos in Topeka and Newkirk. But I had no idea what was going on. The accountant has notified Adult Protective Services and now they are investigating. Mother has even threatened to leave the country if they keep calling her trying to find out what she has done with the money.

It breaks my heart that she could do this to my Gran. If she needed money, she could have asked and, more than likely, Gran would have given it to her. She didn't need to take it. Now she's put my baby's college education at risk and that truly pisses me off. She's put my Gran at risk. Gran is now talking about getting a reverse mortgage to make sure that she has the money to live on. When she does that, there goes the house I knew as a safe haven...the house that I could always go to when I needed to go "home." Mom took the money for the down payment on her house 11 years ago...without asking. Mom's house will never again feel like home for me. Mom will never be the one that I call when I need a mother.

I have put together a pretty good family for myself. I married the most amazing man. Henry is my best friend, my life partner, my everything. I have a beautiful, smart and loving daughter in Rhiannon. Thomas is the best grandfather in the world for Rhiannon. He loves her as if she were his own. Then there are my closest friends. Pam, as flakey as she can be, is just wonderful. Vanessa is not only the best stitching buddy I could have asked for, but she's always there for me when I need her. I guess sometimes you do make some of the best friends of your life when you work with someone for years at a time. And then there's Panda and Stephanie. I haven't seen them in person since 2000 but I know that they will always be there for me. They have been for 18 years now. And there's Merrie. Sweet Merrie. She's the newest edition to our family village. She's just amazing. She adores us and Rhiannon and she wants to help me as much as she can while I'm in so much pain.

I have never missed my Grandfather and my Daddy as much as I do tonight. Daddy may not have been the best father when I was growing up, but I know that he loved me and he truly respected my Grandfather and Gran. He loved me until the day he died. He's been gone now for 16 years. Grandpa has been gone for 20. I was Grandpa's baby. I spent more weekends with my grandparents that I can count. I went to poker games with Grandpa. When I was old enough to drive, I would take him all over town on errands. I loved spending time with him at his farm, watching him on the tractor. I can still smell the fresh tomatoes from his garden that he would bring me. I can almost taste fresh tomatoes, feel the juice running down my arm. Sometimes at night, I can hear him whistling and singing. I really miss him. He would have loved my baby girl...just like he loved me.